You’re SO Difficult!

It’s not just you—I'm difficult too! My wife would tell you I'm not always easy to live with, and I won't argue with her on that. I take up a lot of space in our marriage, and while that’s not necessarily bad, it’s true that we’re all married to someone who can be incredibly difficult. And guess what? They’re married to a difficult person too!

We all carry baggage from our past into our marriages, even if we’ve worked hard to heal. As John Delony says, "the body keeps score." We often clash when our difficult sides come out in our relationship. It's easy to spot it in our spouse, but not so much in ourselves. Maybe in the next blog, I'll talk about how to break through being difficult, but for now, let's focus on embracing it!

Yes, embrace the difficult person you’re married to, because you’re also difficult. Usually, we see our spouse as difficult because they're challenging us in areas where we need to grow and change. It’s much easier to label them as difficult than to change and own up to our actions. Have you ever said, "You are so difficult!"? What you might really mean is, "I’m not willing to listen to your heart and feelings, and I don’t want to own my actions!" Ouch!

I’ll pause here and pick this up in the next blog. But remember, embrace the difficult person you’re married to and choose how you see them. They’re not difficult—they're in process and flawed, just like you!