Nothing Changed!

“Something has to change!” said every couple I have sat down and spoken with over the years. It’s not a statement I would ever argue against; something has to change for improvement to occur. Yet, often, you have two hard-headed and prideful individuals waiting for the other to take the first step toward them and begin to initiate that change. Here lies the underlying problem and an uncomfortable truth: Nothing changes if nothing changes! I will emphasize it once more—nothing changes if nothing changes.

You cannot realistically expect change to manifest if YOU are unwilling to be the catalyst for that change. As a spouse, you might find yourself praying fervently and hoping for things to be different, yet you discover that you remain hesitant to do the necessary work unless your partner does it first. It just doesn’t work that way. If you genuinely want to see meaningful change in your relationship, you must understand that it will start with you.

If you desire marital restoration, stronger communication, or the rebuilding of trust once again, that journey begins with your willingness to adapt and grow. The change you commit to does not hinge on your spouse's actions; you are responsible for taking ownership and initiating change, even if they do not follow suit. Of course, it does require both individuals to work individually and collaboratively to effectively strengthen and heal your marriage.

If you find yourself saying, ”Something has to change!” Stop and remember: Nothing changes if nothing changes!